I'm 12 again!

WOW!

"WOW?" you ask? "WOW!" I say.

Coming up this weekend I'm going to a minor league baseball game followed by one of the largest sports card trade shows in the U.S.

Well, baseball fever is back. I'm 12 again!

The Chicago White Sox have just acquired one of the greatest sluggers of all-time, and future H.O.F., Ken Griffey Jr. They're also in first place, 1 1/2 games up on the ever nagging Minnesota Twins, in the AL Central.

To top off the Jr. trade in which the Sox sent RP Nick Massett and utility infielder Danny Richar to the Reds; the Brew Crew picked up last season's Cy Young Award Winner (it's like the Heisman Trphy for MLB Pitchers) from the Sox rivals, the Indians (they're from Cleveland); the north side homos (Cubs) copied off of their NL Central rival Brewers and got Rich Harden from the land of pitchers (Oakland); and as of the last few minutes, Manny "I'm a fucking douche" Ramirez has been sent to the west coast to play for Joe Torre and the LA Dodgers, while the Red Sox pick up Jason Bay (he's from Canada and hits the ball like Pete Rose) from the Pirates and the Pirates picked up four minor leaguers (2 from LA and 2 from BOS).

That was a hell of a lot of trading.

Speaking of trading, remember when you'd sit in your room and trade cards with your neighbors/friends/classmates? No? Well I do. I stalked you, I had no friends. No, of course I'm kidding. You're not good enough for me to stalk. But, I did spend hours cataloging and organizing and trading my massive (by massive I mean cheap) card collection.

After moving from Wisconsin ( land of Packer fans = FUCK) to Indiana, no one seemed to collect cards anymore (well, there was only 1 person who collected in WI that I traded with, by the time I left). That is, until I went away to college. Where, me and my delinquent roommates began collecting/selling/trading cards again.

Now, 18 years later, I'm going to mecca. That's right, the Chicago Sports Memorabilia Trade Show (or whatever they call it). I don't give a fuck. I call it Mecca.

My collection was made for Frank Thomas, the then almighty slugger for THE Chicago White Sox. Well, Frank and White Sox parted ways a few years ago after an '05 World Series victory (it's like the Super Bowl, but for baseball). I never found my "Moby Dick," my "Holy Grail" if you will:






















Well, it looks like I've got a new "Holy Grail" on Saturday:


















Here's to being 12 again!

Get that summer body fast!

"I'm going to pump....you up!" - Hanz and Franz

In a world where we as people want things fast (I-pods, on-line banking, microwave meals - OK, they've been around awhile) it's no surprise that we often expect results even faster.

Faxes, e-mails, and texts have allowed us to reach people with ease. They get back to us even quicker. Those, my dear reader, are results.

Losing weight? Well, that's QUICK and EASY! Well, with Tribalean, Phen Phen (my personal favorite, come on, LOOK AT THAT NAME), and Yellow Jackets you can achieve that ultimate summer look. Because, lets face it, what woman wouldn't want to look like that bikini bombshell?

Men, you're not alone. While women are out there gulping down pills, you too, can achieve mega huge muscles FAST! Companies like MuscleTech have tons of supplements to help you get Hoooge (huge). As soon as that bikini bombshell loses all that weight, she's not going to want to be seen with you. She'd rather have:







(Because everyone wants to look like them)

Ah, the wonders of advertising. Ah, the wonders of technology.

WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What ever happened to those good old days where men got muscles by doing men things, like digging holes, yard work, building houses? Where women had curves? You know, something larger than a size 0000.

With today's advanced marketing, you get ads everywhere telling you how to look and how to get that body fast!

But.......awww, there's always a but, something like getting big guns or ripped abs, toned tummies, and perfect legs doesn't come easy. Too often people look for the easy way out, and the easy way is not the answer here.

The average person puts on 1/2 lb. of muscle per week. So, in a 52-week year, the average person can put on how many pounds? You can use your fingers and toes.

If you guessed 26 lbs. then by George, you're right. But, that's 26 pounds with a perfect diet and the perfect routine and the perfect set of DNA.

But, on the opposite end, the average person can safely lose up to 2 pounds a week. That's 104 pounds in a year! That's a lot.

So where are the commercials telling you this information? Where are the doctors saying that people's bodies have to adjust to what they're doing and a sudden loss of weight could hamper long term weight loss?

People today, too often are looking for the easy way in or out. So, it's no wonder that they don't know that the key to a good weight gain or weight loss program (which is the key to that summer body) starts in the kitchen. Not at McDonald's, Wendy's, Burger King, Taco Bell, Subway, or DQ, which is where all the ads tell you the key to weight loss is.

Tip #1 for you: cut out the junk. No fast food, no pop/soda, drink lots of water, eat fruits and veggies.

Tip #2 for you: come back soon for the rest.

Going Green

Green is the new black
Everywhere you turn; MSNBC, Oprah, and Planet Green, have all got ways for you to live a greener lifestyle. Even Hollywood celebs like Brad Pitt, Leo DiCaprio, and Hayden Panettiere (I love her, then again, who doesn't?) are jumping on the "Green Wagon" and doing their best to promote a green lifestyle.

So, what is a green lifestyle? If you haven't been living under a rock as of lately, you know....light bulbs, cars, food, and gasoline usage all are incorporated into living a green lifestyle. Wearing hemp? Green. Driving a hybrid car? Green. Making money? Green.

That seems to be the number motive for a lot of people who are jumping into the green money bag.

Livingreen.com has not only outlined several tips on how to live green, but they'll gladly sell you green products to live your green lifestyle.

Green-living.com, well, look at Livingreen.

Lets not forget about EVO.com where they've got everything to help go green from clothes, cars, to well.....money.

While we're at it, why drive to the mall when you could hop online and go to the Ecomall.com?

In a time when our world is rapidly changing, due to greenhouse gases and the changing weather patterns due to the ever popular El Nino, everyone seems to be trying to make a buck on the "Green" trend.

In another concept, why don't we as people try to consume less products, regardless if they're "green" or not. Drive less. Recycle. Drink tap water and fill up a reusable water bottle, rather than chug down bottled water from a plastic bottle that's 30% more green efficient. What ever that means.

It is our duty as citizens of the world to leave this place better than what we found it. Right now it seems we're far away from that. But, there's always tomorrow.

Voting

No voting here
I, a life long White Sox fan did not vote for Jermaine Dye (who at this moment has just hit a triple against the Texas Rangers - W.'s, see below, Texas Rangers) to get into the 2008 All-Star game to be played at Yankee Stadium. It's not that I voted for someone else, either. See, after going through my adolescent years clogging the All-Star ballot boxes at County Stadium - the former home of the Milwaukee (the city in which I spent my favorite baseball loving years) Brewers - I've grown out of it.

Too often the fans don't pay enough attention to the current baseball season to vote for the proper players, all too frequently voting for players who should've either been their last year or not at all. Every All-Star team is filled with great names of great players who've put up not-so-great half seasons.

Well, that can be said for the Presidential election, too. However, I'll be voting in that one. But, many citizens choose to treat the presidential election like the All-Star vote. Voting for the guy who shouldn't be there. I'm not going to point any fingers to any particular elections of late, but for some reason 2000 and 2004 seem to jump out at me like an Olympic pole-vaulter.

Then there are the ones who decide that they're not going to vote at all. "My vote doesn't count," "It's just one vote," "The president doesn't care about me," all seem to be valid arguments (and they're all pretty right on) that people use when avoiding the polls on that wonderful November day.

Well, you've also got to remember who you're voting for. There's the future leader of one of the greatest nations in the world (sorry, America is no longer #1 - how can you be with a struggling economy and a very unpopular war and surging prices on a product that a nation relies so heavily on), but you're also voting for Senators, Mayors, County Commissioners, your neighbors, the people that live in the same town that you live in.

They're the same people that've got the same economic concerns and problems you've got. They're paying bills just like you. They're bringing their kids to soccer practice, baseball practice, softball practice, footb.....well, you get the idea. THEY ARE YOU! They're the ones that care, the ones that'll make a direct impact to your life.

Tattoo

"I want you. All tattooed." - The Offspring
















I finally got it done! What you see above is minutes after my first tattoo, in the Ancient Ink Tattoo Studio. Jeff, the tattoo artist did a fuckin' sweet job. He scripted my last name, "MALONEY" in Olde English lettering with the colors of the Irish flag, green, white (skin tone), and orange across my upper back.

This is the tattoo I've wanted since I was 16 or 17. A long story short it went from being $300 to only costing me $80 out of my account. Winner, this guy!

While at times a bit painful, it was worth it.