I Can't Get to Sleep

"I think about the implications, of diving in too deep" - Men At Work 'Overkill'

After writing the first blog, see below, I realized that I've got a lot of shit running through my head. Now, please keep in mind that this will be a very open blog, about news/sports/music/life/anything else I can think of, I've told a friend this, so someone will hold me accountable to make sure I don't turn this thing into a 14-year-old girl sob story.

Considering it's early Monday morning or late Sunday night (I'll let you pick), and I need to get up at a decent hour tomorrow for work (one of the few times), I've got a million and one thoughts going through my brain.

In two days I will say goodbye to Sox, my Pomapoo (Pomeranian/Poodle), the dog that my former girlfriend (you can use the term "ex" but I'll use "former") and myself got while we still lived in Muncie (Ball State). She, however, moved to Phoenix and got a job in advertising out there and he's now going to live with her. I don't know how I'm going to give him up, it's going to be hard. We'll be down to two dogs (Clover and Molly). Clover has been very sick and has a severe spinal cord injury/problem. She's on pills to help her walk, and she'll stay on them for the rest of her life, whether 2 months or 2 years. Who knows. Then there's Molly. She's a moron, but she's Sox' best friend here (Clover is like a mother to him). They wrestle and play, like dogs do, much to the dismay of Papa Dan(grandpa), who is Molly's owner. He lives at home too.

Then, on top of that wonderful (I use the term 'wonderful' very sarcastically) situation, the thought process of finding a full time job (you know, with benefits, a salary), which is harder than a "bodybuilding elf" (Bloodhound Gang), has got me going mental. The radio industry doesn't like to open its doors to anyone, including people whom are already in the building.

A few thoughts have gone through my head on what to do. Maybe get my master diving certificate and move somewhere "where the weather suits my clothes" (Jimmy Buffett). Paradise, if you will. Then, there's also the stand-up comedy thing. Lets face it, I can make people laugh (I've got skills), but, I'd need more schooling in terms of being a better sketch writer and being funnier in general. Besides, someone's gotta rescue SNL. That show has gone down faster than a $3.00 hooker. The downside with those two dreams is that they'd cost more money than I'm currently worth. I'm not worth a lot. While either/or would make me very happy for the rest of my life, regardless of how poor I am, they're both just dreams.

Yeah, I know there's still the Lowes interview on Friday (that's not really a career choice), but I've also put in an application for Agricultural Commodities as a meat grader/inspector. I used to be a butcher, so it wouldn't be a stretch, and I could handle the job. But, it's with the government, and one can only assume that I wouldn't even get thought of twice for it...considering how many people from the inside are probably applying for the job as well.

Then again this shit won't fall into my lap, as one person put it (then again, she's a lot better off than me - as are most people). It's times like these that I wish I had a surplus of cardboard so I could make up crazy signs and stand next to the highway on/off ramps and shout at people for their capitalism and greed and how that will in time cause the end of the world, meanwhile having a cup available for "tips" or "donations." Then again, that wouldn't work either. My teeth are too nice. Someone would notice.

The only thing that makes a lot of sense right now is to get back into writing. I enjoy writing short stories and have got a layout for a movie script about Blackbeard (the pirate), in my head, however there's a ton more research I need to do on one of the most infamous pirates, who also happens to not have a lot of factual history behind his name. Figures. I rather enjoy getting lost in books and characters, and perhaps that can open my mind and release some of this shit that's going on right now.

Well, here's to hoping that Kenny Williams (White Sox General Manager) does something dumb in the next day or so, so I can rant about that, rather than my "So Called Life" (No musical reference here, that one used to be an actual T.V. show)